Let's Talk Trauma

Let’s talk trauma… Sometimes clients are referred to me by one of the dietitians in my office when they are experiencing unexplained fatigue, sleep disorders, digestive issues and weight changes that don’t make sense based on the amount of exercise and the nutrition plan they are following. This prompts me to play detective and obtain a thorough history. Often when I am reviewing a history from these clients I will ask if they’ve had a history of high or prolonged stress or trauma. (Of course I am careful that we have first established a comfortable relationship and I am gentle in how I ask that question and I do not push for information). It always amazes me when I broach the subject of people's stress levels or their trauma histories how incredibly varied their responses may be. I recall several years ago I had a colleague working with me who had an incredibly traumatic earlier life, escaping death as a refugee. She was rooming one of my patients who was sobbing and in my schedule for anxiety. The client was completely overwhelmed as she had purchased a summer home and wasn’t sure which furniture would look best. My medical assistant really seemed perplexed in that moment and I quoted back to her something a very wise friend of mine said to me years ago “We don’t compare pain”. I ran into this very wise friend when I was going through a divorce and we hadn’t seen each other in a while. I knew she had gone through some horrific recent losses and so when she asked me how I was doing I said to her “Never mind me, What I’m going through is minimal compared to what you have going on”. That’s when she shared the beautiful nugget of wisdom above with me. That has stayed with me ever since and I’ve quoted it regularly with other people. There are people who become very overwhelmed with the ins and outs of every day life. They may struggle with anxiety or lack of self-worth and trust. In the absence of trauma, simply adulting can create overwhelm and stress. More perplexing are the people who will tell me they have no stress or trauma history all while they are the single parent to five children( three of which have special needs) ,caring for an elderly parent and working two jobs. And further history reveals they grew up in foster care with addicted parents. Yet somehow in this person’s mind, other people have it “ worse”. Most people are aware of trauma in the context of PTSD and generally associate that term with someone who has experienced war time as a soldier or has a sexual assault history. In fact there is a wide spectrum of events and circumstances that can be classified as traumatic. Growing up with emotional neglect or abuse, history of childhood illness, divorce in the family, being bullied, job loss, a significantly embarrassing childhood event, loss of a loved one etc. Unprocessed trauma can remain with us long-term and often people are unaware of it. It can present in the classic ways with generalized anxiety, depression and panic disorder. Often unrecognized is the general presentation we find in our healthcare offices. Weight changes, sleep disturbances, overwhelming fatigue, digestive issues, headaches, pelvic pain ,sexual dysfunction, hormonal changes, eating disorders, substance abuse. I am not an expert in trauma. However I have had to become knowledgeable in order to be able to support my clients after seeing the overwhelming link between trauma and physical wellness. There are tests we can run and supplements and medications we can recommend, changes in diet and complementary therapies like yoga and meditation. What I tell my clients is that in order for these things to truly be effective, they will often need to move forward with targeted efforts to heal from the trauma. We are lucky to be in a community with excellent mental health providers and therapists who are qualified to help process trauma. What that looks like will be different for each individual. Some people benefit from talk therapy, cognitive behavioral therapy‘s, hypnosis, energy work and specialized treatments such as EMDR (Eye movement Desensitization and Reprocessing). We know that everyday stressors and more pervasive stressors that pop into our lives can trigger us to spend far too much time in a state of excitation we call ``fight or flight”. Trauma and its impact on the subconscious can cause us to perpetually be in this cycle of alert/alarm. Our bodies are not designed to remain in this state which is what leads to the significant impact on our physical health. So you can be an incredibly wise person, you can be an incredibly resilient person, you can live a life that you consider to be relatively stress-free and you can still struggle with the impact of unhealed trauma. My favorite saying (I have it printed in my office) is “remove the rock from your shoe rather than learning to limp comfortably” Please do not struggle alone, you don’t have to. Talk to a trusted healthcare provider, seek support and referrals to appropriate mental health providers. You deserve peace and healing and happiness.